Yo Soccer Ma!

I am a soccer mom.  

I am the mom on the sidelines screaming.  Yelling.  Jumping.  Cheering.  I believe I pulled a muscle today during our last soccer game of the season.

The league we played with this year is a league that focuses on good sportsmanship and therefore doesn't keep score.  

But mama keeps score.

Here are some truths about being a soccer mom:

1.  Your child's goals always count. Even if it is in the wrong goal.

2.  Family involvement in crucial.  Sporting team colors.  Sporting your player's number.  

3.  Cuteness outranks skill in a sportsmanship focused league.  As long as your child is cute going down the field, that is what matters.

4.  Stretch.  I mentioned I pulled a muscle today.  I failed to stretch.  

5.  Have a good support system.  And, no I am not talking about peer support....get it.

6.  Always yell for your team players by name.  Even if it is the wrong name.  This year we had a Cole and a Joel.  Keegan and Kingston.  By the end of the season the players knew that I would call them the wrong name and that is just a fact of life.  If they had the ball and I was yelling, they knew they were the one on the receiving end of the yell.

Here's to all soccer moms!!!!  

Run!

Scream!

Jump!

Stretch!

Are We Eating Out?

This morning I made an executive decision!  I decided to get out of bed, shower, get dressed, put on shoes, and do my hair!

I felt good.  I felt put together.  I felt ready to take on the day.

Our three year old daughter looked at me and said "Are we eating out?!"

***Big Gulp*** It hit me...mommy needs to make this executive decision more often.

I may be the only stay at home mom that goes on this crazy cycle. The cycle of taking good care of myself, to just not caring, to taking good care of myself, to just not caring, etc.  Although, I am going to guess that I am not the only one that does this.

I recently read an article from Focus on the Family about taking care of yourself as a stay at home mom.

(http://www.focusonthefamily.com/parenting/parenting-roles/stay-at-home-moms-taking-care-of-yourself/stay-at-home-moms-taking-care-of-yourself)

According to the article, there are seven main areas to take care of yourself.  SEVEN!  I thought the same thing, I can't even be alone for SEVEN minutes, how in the world am I going to do seven things to care for myself?!

Upon reading the article, the seven are broken down to bite size morsels.  Remember, you eat an elephant one bite at a time.

The seven points are:

1. Take Care Of Yourself
2. Take Care Of Your Body
3. Take Care Of Your Mind
4. Learn To Say "No"
5. Prioritize
6. Ask For Help
7. Know Yourself

If I did each of these things for ten minutes a day (a little over an hour), then I can take care of myself daily!  An hour, I can find an hour each day to take care of myself.

How about my fellow stay at home moms, tell me how you take care of yourself!!!!

M-O-M

Today I had what I would say is the perfect Mother's Day!

Our original plans were to go to the water park after church, but as with some plans, they changed.

My family is one of the most important things to me.  In the matter of priority in my life it goes God then my family.  My husband and children complete me and they make my life so full of joy and adventure.  As with all moms, I need a break every now and then.  As with some moms, I don't remember the last time I had a break where I was able to just relax.  I am okay with that. Our oldest child is almost ten years old and our youngest is almost four years old.  If they each stay in our home until they are twenty, that is really only a few years of quality time with them. I can say without a doubt (no matter how tired I am by that time) that I spent much time with my children and made them a priority.  My calling is to be a wife and mom first, everything else can wait.

With that, all I wanted today was to hang out with my family.  I got that and a lot more!

I was given an bouquet of beautiful, bright fresh flowers by my husband and children. I love having fresh flowers in our kitchen.

At church I had the honor of sitting with one of my moms and my sister, niece, and nephew.  It was special to share Mother's Day with them. 

I made an excellent lunch (if I do say so myself), after we all got home and all ate, it was too late to go to the water park.  After much deliberation, I decided I just wanted to relax.

I have been going non-stop since Wednesday morning, and I just needed a break!  My husband took the children and they played outside from 3:30 pm to 7:00 pm, while I slept.  Snoring.  Drooling. Dreaming.  Sleep.  I guess while we were discussing what to do the rest of the day, I fell asleep! This is the best gift I could have received.  I am not a big holiday person, we give each other gifts all year and honor each other daily, that is our lifestyle; when holidays come for me it is just another day.  This however, was an excellent gift.  The gift of rejuvenation.

A few minutes after I woke up there was a knock at our door.  Where we live, people aren't just "in the neighborhood" so I was a little shocked.  When my husband answered the door there stood my mom that I shared church with this morning, my sister, my brother, and my niece and nephew.  We had an excellent visit - complete with conversation, laughing, and exploring.

Today, was the perfect Mother's Day for me.  I hope each of my fellow moms had an amazing day as well!

The Power of the Special Needs Mom

I am a new writer for Mississippi Gulf Coast Parent network, and my first article went live today!  

You can read it at http://msgulfcoastparent.com/the-super-powers-of-a-special-needs-parent/

I enjoyed writing this article!  There is a secret strength that comes with a special needs mom, one that cannot be explained, only experienced.  I hope you enjoy reading my thoughts as much as I enjoyed writing them!

The Empty Armed Mommy

Let's talk about Mother's Day.  

This week and weekend will be all about the special qualities of moms.  The giving, holding, loving, patient mommies.  

Today, I want to take time  to talk to the mommies who are unable to hold their children in their arms.  

Each of my children are rainbow babies.  A rainbow baby is a baby born after a miscarriage, still birth, or death of a child.  I have three children whom I gave live birth to and five children whom I was never able to hold in my arms.  I am so grateful for my children that I get to spend hours with a day, yet a part of me still mourns the children who won't fill our home with laughter, memories, and I will never hear "mama" from their mouths.  

To my fellow mommies who have children in heaven playing with Jesus, I am going to hope that our children are playing together.  

You are a strong mommy, you lost a part of yourself when you lost your precious baby.  Allow yourself to grieve this week, allow your heart to be open.  Your little one may not be on the earth right now, but you are still their mommy.  You still have the love of a mother in your heart for your little one.  YOU ARE A MOMMY.  Don't let anyone ever tell you that because your child is not on earth that you are not a mommy, you are.  

Your heart may be breaking this week especially.  Write a letter to your little one and allow yourself to celebrate the life of your child, no matter if the child was eight weeks gestation or thirty five years old, allow yourself to celebrate the child.  Your child is what has made you a mommy.  

Take time to take care of yourself this week, this is what all of us mommies strive to do.  Something nice for ourselves.  Talk about your feelings with your husband or a close friend.  Journal.  Buy yourself some flowers.  Get a pedicure.  Paint a picture.  Make a happy memory.  Go for a walk.  Laugh.  Cry.  Do all those things that a mommy does.  

The grief of a mother losing a child is one that is never just gone.  The hopes.  The memories.  The reminders.  They are real.  They are true.  

This week celebrate you and all of those hopes, memories, and reminders.  

The Bald Spot

We moved into our house on Saturday!  And, we made our first memory in our new house on Saturday as well!  This memory involves our three year old daughter and a bald spot that is about the size of a half dollar.

I was unpacking in one area of our house.  My husband was talking with the satellite guy in another area of our house.  Our children were playing in various other places in our house.

I was in my groove, unpacking box after box.  Our oldest son came to me with what appeared to be a rat's tail or a dead snake in his hand.  We live in the country now, so I wasn't all too surprised.  I told him that was nasty and to put it outside or in the trash.  Then the shock hit, he said "Mom, this is Reese's hair!"  

My heart all but stopped.  I felt bile rising in my throat.  I followed my oldest and found our daughter in my closet.  I have an at home foot spa that has an accessory for different tool heads and rotates.  She was holding the accessory in her hair, her hair wound around the motor.  She wasn't crying, but I did!  

Our sons both have cut their own hair, and while it frustrated me, I could buzz the hair easily enough to blend it.  Our daughter now has a huge bald spot in the middle front of her hair!  I have learned creative ways to hide the spot of missing hair.  I have to remind myself to put extra sunblock on that one part of her head!  

I have said time and again that motherhood is not for the weak or faint of heart!  This week I have put into practice what Erma Bombeck said "If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it."

Teach On Teacher!

This week is Teacher Appreciation Week!

Each day teachers should be appreciated!  As a former-homeschooling-mom and now a public school parent, I give each teacher a standing ovation and a huge round of applause!

Regardless of your opinion of public (or private) education, there is something to be said about a person who can take a room full of 20 plus children and educate them in a way they will understand.  School is not at all like it was when I was in elementary school, the requirements for what children should know have fast forwarded to earlier ages.  The freedom for teachers to take one-on-one time with a student or incorporate other projects into the day have been all but stripped away.  There are so many new standards for teachers and demands, that the fleeting thoughts I have about going back to college for an elementary education degree are immediately extinguished.  Well that, and the fact that I don't like other people's children....but that is another story for another day....just know if I ever offer to watch your children I really mean it - I don't generally volunteer to be around children besides my own.  Again...another story for another day. 

If your child comes home on a less than stellar behavior mark, ask your teacher about it if you disagree.  Don't immediately jump down the teacher's throat...actually don't jump down their throat at all.  Make sure you get both sides of the story, both your child's and the teachers.  If you don't agree with the behavior mark, then don't discipline at home, but don't bad mouth the teacher to your child.  If my children come home on a behavior mark we deem unacceptable, we discipline our children accordingly. If the story sounds outlandish that my child gives me, I always contact the teacher to find out their side of the story as well.  Then I deal with it accordingly.   This year, one of my children's teacher has met me in the car rider line to explain situations to me or has wrote a note home regarding a behavior note, and knows I will call her to find out what has happened.  Be the parent who the teacher is going to be respected by; show your children an example of respect.

Volunteer your time or talents.  I know that in this day, parents are not able to volunteer in the classroom like they were when I was young.  But, ask the teacher what you can do to help.  Our teachers are great about sending home notes of what is needed in the classroom and we are happy to send in items.  The stories we hear of teachers salaries are true and teachers pay for most of the things for their classroom out of pocket.  Not only are they teaching because of the love of teaching, but they are teaching because they need to make money as well.  During the holidays, ask your teachers what you can do to help.  I send double of what is asked for during the holidays so the teacher may not have to buy so much out of pocket.  The teacher may say they do not need any help, and that is okay, at least you asked and they know it is there if it is needed.

Encourage your teachers.  I like to send just little messages of "Thank you" or "I appreciate you" to the teachers throughout the year.  Even if it is in a simple correspondence, I make sure the teacher knows I appreciate all they do for my children.  As with any job, even for me as a stay at home mom, it is essential to know you are appreciated, a word of encouragement can go a long way, and you never know when a teacher will need to hear "you're doing a good job!"

Pray for your teachers.  Every morning we pray together as a family, and I make sure we pray for each of my children's teachers and assistant teachers.  Teachers spend at least thirty hours a week with your child.  I pray for the teachers health, sanity, that they have a passion for teaching, for their families, and for the school as a whole.  If someone is investing time in my children I expect them to be healthy physically and mentally!  I have three children, different ages, and two of them are in school most of the day.  By 6 pm I am exhausted, grumpy, and just want to go to bed.  That is only with three children, I can't imagine how teachers feel.  Not only do they teach all day, but they go home to to their own families and children.  They have to have a heart for teaching and they need our prayers.

Take time to tell the teachers in your life "thank you", they need to hear it and they deserve 
it!

Am I Six?

Today is our second child's sixth birthday!  He is a full of life, energetic, little ball of laughs.  There are many things he says and does that remind me of my grandpa, and that is so precious!  

For him, the age of six is the age of perfection.  Since I can remember, he has wanted to be six.  He has longed to be six.  Even at the beginning of the year he would start telling others he was six!  

This morning as we were talking, our conversation went like this:

Child: "Mom, am I six now?"

Me: "Yep, today's your birthday.  Your finally six!!"

Child: "Hmmmm......I don't feel like I am six."

Me:  "How is six supposed to feel?"

Child: "Different.  Like six"

Me:  "Trust me baby, you're six.  I remember clearly when you were born. You were the loudest and tiniest baby I have ever had; even the doctor and nurses said how loud you were!"

Child: "I don't think you know when I was born, I just don't feel six!"

                                                             


I don't quite know how he was expecting six to feel, but by the time he left for school I am sure I had him half way realizing that he is six.



Life lesson of the day from a six year old:  Life doesn't always feel or go the way you expected it would.  Just trust that it is going the way it is meant to!  Celebrate...even when you don't feel  six!!!