Morning Affirmations

Growing up, as my parents drove my brothers and I to school, we would say "affirmations".  My dad would find what the Bible said about who we are in Christ and we would just say them.  It often became a competition between my brothers and I, of who could say the most and the loudest.  Then I became full of teen angst and would roll my eyes and grumble the affirmations.  

But fear not dad and mom, those days did not go by in vain!

As my husband and I take our three children to school each morning, I pray over them as we drive, and then we say our morning affirmations.  Some mornings it is said with zeal, some mornings it is merely whispered in exasperation.  In the half mile drive from our home to school, one person will say the affirmation and the rest will repeat.  

Yesterday  morning our daughter wanted to say the morning affirmations. They went like this, she would say the affirmation and the rest of us would repeat:

"I'm the light of the world"
"I'm the salt of the earth"
"Girls say this: I'm pretty"
"Boys say this: I'm handsome"
"I'm loved"
"I'm the apple of God's eye"
"We will go to Chick-Fil-A after school"
"I am happy"
"I am smart"
"I will get ice cream at Chick-Fil-A"

Yes....you see what she did there!  That little smart girl thought we would repeat that we would go to Chick-Fil-A and get ice cream after school!  My husband and I got a good laugh out of that...and after school, you guessed it, we went straight home! 

How do you speak to your children?  Do you encourage them?  Do you tell them they are smart?  Do you speak things that aren't as though they are?  

Our words have power.  Think about the words that have broken you down in life.  Those are hard to recover from.  Think about the words that have built you up in life.  Those are cherished.  I remember when I was 23 years old, pregnant with our oldest child, my mom was speaking at a ladies meeting and she said in front of everyone at the meeting "My daughter is strong and doing things at her age that I could never do.  I am proud of her."  That was over eleven years ago, and I still get teary when I think of it.  Her words brought me life, and when I feel weak I recall that.  On the flip side, when I was a teenager a boyfriend and I broke up.  The morning after we broke up my dad told me to come look at the end of our driveway, to the only water tower in town.  In that moment, I saw words that my heart has never forgot, in huge, bright spray paint for the whole town to see were the words "psycho expletive" (that starts with a "b" but the entire word was spelled out).  Man, that hurt.  Writing this it still hurts...almost twenty years later.  I hold no ill will towards the person, but when I hear the word "psycho", I cringe.  Because words hurt.  But words also hold the salve to heal wounds caused from the past.  Last night, my husband told me "I am proud of you because you allow God to work in you and change you,no matter if you like it or not.  You are selfless and put others first."  Those words are words that I wrote down and will think of often.

I would like to encourage you to speak good things in your life.  If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all!

If you don't know where to find some positive Godly affirmations, look in the Bible.  They're all over.  But below are some to start you off:

I am a child of God.  (John 1:12)
I am a friend of Jesus.  (John 15:15)
I have been accepted by Christ.  (Romans 15:7)

God leads me in the triumph and knowledge of Christ.  (2 Corinthians 2:14)
I am a new creature in Christ.  (2 Corinthians 5:17)
I have been set free in Christ. (Galatians 5:1)
I am chosen, holy, and blameless before God.  (Ephesians 1:4)
I am God's workmanship created to produce good works.  (Ephesians 2:10)
The peace of God guards my heart and mind.  (Philippians 4:7)
God supplies all my needs. (Philippians 4:19)
I have been made complete in Christ.  (Colossians 2:9-10)
God loves me and has chosen me.  (1 Thessalonians 1:4)

 

Start speaking life over your children, your spouse, your family, your friends, your self!  You will be amazed how the atmosphere around you will change when you speak positive things!

The Napkin

It takes a lot for me to get upset.  It takes even more for my heart to be broken.  And, it takes a whole lot for me to sob and ugly cry because I am upset.  Don't get me wrong, I cry...a lot.  I cry when I am happy.  I cry when I am grateful.  I cry when I am nervous.  I cry when I am surprised.  But rarely do I cry because I am upset.

Last night I sobbed and ugly cried because I was upset.  No one did anything to me.  

No one did anything to my children.  No one did anything to my husband.  No one did anything to my mama, my daddy, or my grammy.

But something happened that caused my heart to break.  To crush.

My husband and I were at a local establishment with two of our children.  My daughter and I went to the restroom.  As we were washing our hands a mother came in with her children, cussing them out.  Sadly, hearing that is not abnormal these days.  And I don't judge the mother because we have all been at the end of our rope.  We have all lost it.  Not everyone cusses out their children, not everyone says what this mother says.  But in our own ways we lose it.

But that wasn't what upset me.  It saddened me.  Because no one should be talked to like that.

What upset me is I looked at the children.  I will not go into details about what I saw, but I will say it was startling and upsetting.  Please note I am not stating signs of physical abuse.  But what I saw was confusion.  I dared to look into the children's eyes, while holding my daughters hand.  My daughter was skipping, holding my hand, excitedly talking about the pizza she was about to eat and a surprise she would receive later.

The other children.  Their eyes were dead.  Emotionless.  Not a hint of sadness.  Not a hint of anger.  Just emotionless.  In the brief seconds my eyes met theirs I saw a story of confusion, rejection, and a life that was what it should not have been.  The children appeared to be right around my children's age.  But their eyes told the story of a childhood that never was.

I caught my breath.  Tried to focus on my daughter who was now talking about how much she loves her teachers and asking what her surprise was.  As we ate our pizza, the usual deliciousness was replaced by nausea and a feeling akin to panic.  My husband knew I was upset, he could tell I was on the verge of losing my tears and perhaps my food.  As soon as the kids were finished eating, we left.  

We walked to our vehicle, our children talking about watching "The Jungle Book" when we got home, and asking where we were going next for their surprise.  Then I saw the children and mother again getting into their vehicle.  I was holding my son's hand, and trying not to stare at the other children.  My insides knotted up and I wanted to run to the children and tell them I am sorry for what has happened in their life.  I wanted to protect those children.  But we kept walking to our vehicle.

As we got in our vehicle, I lost it.  I sobbed quietly.  I tried not to vomit.  I had not felt my heart break like that for someone else in years.  I remember the last time my heart broke like that for a stranger, I wasn't even married.  I used to be compassionate, but I turned off all compassion and made my own heart hard to others so I wouldn't feel.  

We drove to a store.  My children excitedly talking about anything and everything.  I silently sobbed in the front seat, trying not to let my voice break as I answered their questions.  They did notice and the "what's wrong mom?" questions began.  Thankfully my husband was able to tell them I was okay.  I used almost all of the napkins in my glove box to dry my tears and cover the sound of my heart wrenching sobs.  I kept thinking, praying, silently calling out to God  "help those kids."

We got to the store, and I asked my husband if it was obvious I had been crying.  He said nah that I was fine.  We all know my nose was red and my eyes were swollen.  So, I took one more napkin in the store with me, to pretend I had 'allergies' so maybe people wouldn't stare.  

I put the napkin in my pocket.  We went about the night.  The heartbreak I felt started to soothe.  It was soothed by the sound of my children's laughter.  Their excitement over ice cream.  And when we picked up our other child from a friend's home, it was soothed by having my family together.

This morning I changed my clothes and put on the same shorts I wore yesterday (yep that's what I do), and felt something in my pocket.  I reached in and pulled out the napkin I used to wipe my tears amidst my heart break over the children from yesterday.  As soon as I saw the napkin, I felt my heart start to quiver and crack.

That napkin is a reminder that I can pray for those kids.  It doesn't seem like I am doing much.  But praying is what I can do.  I can pray for them as I pray for my own kids.  I can pray for their parents, that they have softer hearts.  The napkin was also a reminder that God is doing a work in my own heart.  God is bringing back a softness that I long ago buried.  He is tenderly allowing me to feel compassion, sympathy and empathy again.  And He is helping me realize that praying is sometimes "all" I can do.  But prayer is not a small thing.  All throughout the Bible we are taught about the power of prayer.  Prayer isn't small, but sometimes it is all I can do.

Wherever those children are and whatever is going on in their homes and lives, I pray someone intersects their lives and introduces them to Jesus.  That God becomes their hiding place and safety.

When you see something heartbreaking.  Pray.  God can do mighty things.