New Year, New Goals

Seven years ago today, I did the best thing I could have done for my family.  I became a stay at home mom.

The first year of being a stay at home mom was difficult financially, learning to live on a singe income that was less than half of what we were making when I worked outside the home.  Realizing that sitcoms had stay at home moms in a light that was unrealistic. We essentially went back to the basics.  We were used to buying what we wanted, when we wanted, without a thought.  Eating out was a way of life.  I would get essentially a new wardrobe every weekend.

For a long time we did without internet, cable, and I learned quickly the art of making a meal out of three cans of food.  After I became a stay at home mom, we made poor financial choices that we didn't square away until a year and a half ago.  We are now debt free and in the process of rebuilding our good credit.  Protect your credit!

Now as a veteran stay at home mom and as a mom who has had experience being a work outside the home mom, I have learned many things:

1. The Joneses Suck:  Don't worry about what other families are doing.  Do what works for you and your family.  Learn from others, but don't get jealous and try to be like them.  Create your own life.

2.  You Either Manage Your Money Or Your Money Manages You:  We learned through very difficult experiences to manage our money.  Don't live within a box of not enough, alter your lifestyle so your money is enough.  Be aware that everyone has different financial situations, respect yourself and your husband enough to stay within your means.

3.  Create Your Own Happiness:  Being a stay at home mom isn't always glamorous and can sometimes be lonely.  If there is one aspect of being a stay at home mom that you absolutely love, make it a priority.  Don't depend on others to make you happy, this is your life, you need to take it by the horns.

4.  Take Time For You: Being a stay at home mom is a job.  No matter what anyone else says, it is a job!  Take time off.  Time off won't be what typical jobs are, you won't get fifteen minute breaks or a lunch break, but do what you need to do to take care of you.  I have girls nights often because I need time off.  I go to coffee with friends.  I try to make myself a priority a few times a month.

5.  Rely On God:  Cliche.  I know.  But true. Take time with God daily.  As a stay at home mom, you can't always block out a half hour to read your Bible and pray.  You can be in a constant state of prayer, open YouVersion and use a translation that has audio and listen to it, put on worship music.  Listen to sermons online or on tv as you go about your day.  When you are at your wits end, focus on Jesus.  Make Him your first priority and He will give you all the wisdom and strength you need.

If you want to be a stay at home mom, look at your options.  Decide what you can do without and begin cutting away the fat of your finances.  See if you can go to a part time job first then to being a full time stay at home mom.