I'm That Mom

I am going to admit it...I'm that mom.  

I am the mom whose child desperately doesn't want to go to school, yet sends him crying.  I am that mom, because I was that child.  

To the child in reference, he does have chronic migraine headaches, but he went the entire summer without one episode, so  I see a pattern of school equals headaches.  In his defense, he didn't look like he felt that well, but I know for a fact that he wasn't "sick" as in contagious, so off to school he went.  I received two calls from the school nurse, but at school he stayed.  Why am I that mom?  Because I was that child.

For a little while I had being "sick" down to an art.  When I was eight and nine years old I was able to be sent home frequently with "fever", because I figured out how to get my temperature up.  To my defense, there was abuse happening in the school, which made school a horrible experience for me.  For quite a while my mom would leave work and come pick me up.  But then, she became that mom.  The mom that basically told me to suck it up.  

Now, let me say, if my child has fever, a virus, is really ill, he or she will stay home from school.  But other than that, to school they go.  Today, I felt a bit guilty.  For one, it was raining so it was the first day I actually dropped my children off in the car rider line and didn't walk them to the drop off point.  So I basically pushed the child in reference out of the vehicle as he was crying, and I left his brother to help him get inside and to class.  Then when the nurse called the first time and assured me that he had no fever but a headache, I told her to just give him some ibuprofen and he can stay at school.  The second time the nurse called, I talked to my child and promised him a cupcake if he made it through the day.  After school, as my children were walking out the son with the headache tripped and fell.  Then when we got home, I made him do his homework...after the promised cupcake.  Then I made him go to football practice, but I didn't make him get on the field and practice.  I felt a bit guilty because this is our first year at a new school and I don't want to be the calloused mom who leaves their children at school not feeling well.  This is also our first year of football,  But at the same time, there is a matter of importance of education; and we believe that if you sign up, you show up!

I know I am not the only mom out there who has this same mindset.  If you are a mom who is like this, let me know!  Give me your thoughts!  

Do You Hear An Echo?

Hello!  Hello!  Hello! (Do you hear the echo from my sadly empty blog?)

We are one week from the first day of school.  My two oldest children are starting football on Saturday.  And I am looking for a way to recover from summer!

A little update from our home:

We are still madly in love with our new home and are even more in love with our small town!  Sadly, our home was broken into the first week of June and our computer was one of the things stolen.  Writing has been on hold due to the lack of a computer.  But, I am back and I am catching up on my writing!  I did not realize how much I missed writing until I sat down and let it flow.  This is much cheaper than therapy!

This summer was all about friends, water parks, splash pads, and having fun!   Our middle child learned to ride a two wheel bike without training wheels.  We had our first stitches experience this summer.  We also gave everyone down our road quite a show when I was washing a tractor in our driveway…yes you read that right.  There aint nothing like a country girl!

We are waiting on word if our youngest child was accepted into a local preschool program that I applied for quite a while ago.  If everything works out, each child will be in school this year.  If not, I will have another year of cuddling my youngest!   Our two oldest start in their brand new school this year, they had the opportunity of meeting some of the teachers and classmates this summer, so hopefully that will help their nerves.  I don’t know if it will help this mama’s nerves though!  They are also beginning a two week football camp on Saturday, followed by the season.  They haven’t played football in a league before so this will be another something new for them.  Yes, mama is excited but also feeling a little bit of pressure!

What I want to know from you, is what do you want to read about during the coming months?  My life is very interesting (insert sarcasm), but I am sure you’re ready to read something else!  Let me know!!

Rebecca

Yo Soccer Ma!

I am a soccer mom.  

I am the mom on the sidelines screaming.  Yelling.  Jumping.  Cheering.  I believe I pulled a muscle today during our last soccer game of the season.

The league we played with this year is a league that focuses on good sportsmanship and therefore doesn't keep score.  

But mama keeps score.

Here are some truths about being a soccer mom:

1.  Your child's goals always count. Even if it is in the wrong goal.

2.  Family involvement in crucial.  Sporting team colors.  Sporting your player's number.  

3.  Cuteness outranks skill in a sportsmanship focused league.  As long as your child is cute going down the field, that is what matters.

4.  Stretch.  I mentioned I pulled a muscle today.  I failed to stretch.  

5.  Have a good support system.  And, no I am not talking about peer support....get it.

6.  Always yell for your team players by name.  Even if it is the wrong name.  This year we had a Cole and a Joel.  Keegan and Kingston.  By the end of the season the players knew that I would call them the wrong name and that is just a fact of life.  If they had the ball and I was yelling, they knew they were the one on the receiving end of the yell.

Here's to all soccer moms!!!!  

Run!

Scream!

Jump!

Stretch!

Are We Eating Out?

This morning I made an executive decision!  I decided to get out of bed, shower, get dressed, put on shoes, and do my hair!

I felt good.  I felt put together.  I felt ready to take on the day.

Our three year old daughter looked at me and said "Are we eating out?!"

***Big Gulp*** It hit me...mommy needs to make this executive decision more often.

I may be the only stay at home mom that goes on this crazy cycle. The cycle of taking good care of myself, to just not caring, to taking good care of myself, to just not caring, etc.  Although, I am going to guess that I am not the only one that does this.

I recently read an article from Focus on the Family about taking care of yourself as a stay at home mom.

(http://www.focusonthefamily.com/parenting/parenting-roles/stay-at-home-moms-taking-care-of-yourself/stay-at-home-moms-taking-care-of-yourself)

According to the article, there are seven main areas to take care of yourself.  SEVEN!  I thought the same thing, I can't even be alone for SEVEN minutes, how in the world am I going to do seven things to care for myself?!

Upon reading the article, the seven are broken down to bite size morsels.  Remember, you eat an elephant one bite at a time.

The seven points are:

1. Take Care Of Yourself
2. Take Care Of Your Body
3. Take Care Of Your Mind
4. Learn To Say "No"
5. Prioritize
6. Ask For Help
7. Know Yourself

If I did each of these things for ten minutes a day (a little over an hour), then I can take care of myself daily!  An hour, I can find an hour each day to take care of myself.

How about my fellow stay at home moms, tell me how you take care of yourself!!!!

M-O-M

Today I had what I would say is the perfect Mother's Day!

Our original plans were to go to the water park after church, but as with some plans, they changed.

My family is one of the most important things to me.  In the matter of priority in my life it goes God then my family.  My husband and children complete me and they make my life so full of joy and adventure.  As with all moms, I need a break every now and then.  As with some moms, I don't remember the last time I had a break where I was able to just relax.  I am okay with that. Our oldest child is almost ten years old and our youngest is almost four years old.  If they each stay in our home until they are twenty, that is really only a few years of quality time with them. I can say without a doubt (no matter how tired I am by that time) that I spent much time with my children and made them a priority.  My calling is to be a wife and mom first, everything else can wait.

With that, all I wanted today was to hang out with my family.  I got that and a lot more!

I was given an bouquet of beautiful, bright fresh flowers by my husband and children. I love having fresh flowers in our kitchen.

At church I had the honor of sitting with one of my moms and my sister, niece, and nephew.  It was special to share Mother's Day with them. 

I made an excellent lunch (if I do say so myself), after we all got home and all ate, it was too late to go to the water park.  After much deliberation, I decided I just wanted to relax.

I have been going non-stop since Wednesday morning, and I just needed a break!  My husband took the children and they played outside from 3:30 pm to 7:00 pm, while I slept.  Snoring.  Drooling. Dreaming.  Sleep.  I guess while we were discussing what to do the rest of the day, I fell asleep! This is the best gift I could have received.  I am not a big holiday person, we give each other gifts all year and honor each other daily, that is our lifestyle; when holidays come for me it is just another day.  This however, was an excellent gift.  The gift of rejuvenation.

A few minutes after I woke up there was a knock at our door.  Where we live, people aren't just "in the neighborhood" so I was a little shocked.  When my husband answered the door there stood my mom that I shared church with this morning, my sister, my brother, and my niece and nephew.  We had an excellent visit - complete with conversation, laughing, and exploring.

Today, was the perfect Mother's Day for me.  I hope each of my fellow moms had an amazing day as well!

The Power of the Special Needs Mom

I am a new writer for Mississippi Gulf Coast Parent network, and my first article went live today!  

You can read it at http://msgulfcoastparent.com/the-super-powers-of-a-special-needs-parent/

I enjoyed writing this article!  There is a secret strength that comes with a special needs mom, one that cannot be explained, only experienced.  I hope you enjoy reading my thoughts as much as I enjoyed writing them!

The Empty Armed Mommy

Let's talk about Mother's Day.  

This week and weekend will be all about the special qualities of moms.  The giving, holding, loving, patient mommies.  

Today, I want to take time  to talk to the mommies who are unable to hold their children in their arms.  

Each of my children are rainbow babies.  A rainbow baby is a baby born after a miscarriage, still birth, or death of a child.  I have three children whom I gave live birth to and five children whom I was never able to hold in my arms.  I am so grateful for my children that I get to spend hours with a day, yet a part of me still mourns the children who won't fill our home with laughter, memories, and I will never hear "mama" from their mouths.  

To my fellow mommies who have children in heaven playing with Jesus, I am going to hope that our children are playing together.  

You are a strong mommy, you lost a part of yourself when you lost your precious baby.  Allow yourself to grieve this week, allow your heart to be open.  Your little one may not be on the earth right now, but you are still their mommy.  You still have the love of a mother in your heart for your little one.  YOU ARE A MOMMY.  Don't let anyone ever tell you that because your child is not on earth that you are not a mommy, you are.  

Your heart may be breaking this week especially.  Write a letter to your little one and allow yourself to celebrate the life of your child, no matter if the child was eight weeks gestation or thirty five years old, allow yourself to celebrate the child.  Your child is what has made you a mommy.  

Take time to take care of yourself this week, this is what all of us mommies strive to do.  Something nice for ourselves.  Talk about your feelings with your husband or a close friend.  Journal.  Buy yourself some flowers.  Get a pedicure.  Paint a picture.  Make a happy memory.  Go for a walk.  Laugh.  Cry.  Do all those things that a mommy does.  

The grief of a mother losing a child is one that is never just gone.  The hopes.  The memories.  The reminders.  They are real.  They are true.  

This week celebrate you and all of those hopes, memories, and reminders.